Obama to be enshrined on Mt. Rushmore

In the above photo, the Senator is shown with a park ranger, being shown where his face will be going.

[Keystone, SD] It was learned today that plans have been finalized to place the likeness of Illinois Senator Barrack Obama on Mt. Rushmore to honor his incredible contributions to America. His face will replace disgraced slave-owner Thomas Jefferson.
Above, Illinois Senator Barrack Obama strikes one of the possible poses that will be used for the monument's reconstruction.
Above is the artist's depiction of how the finished "New 'Bama Rushmore" might look.

Reached for comment at his Chicago estate, long-time Obama friend and spiritual advisor Rev. Jeremiah Wright (Pictured below, right) said, "While this is a step in the right direction, this will never begin to atone for America injecting the Aids virus into all black people around the world. God damn America! God DAMN America!"
Pictured on the left is an unidentified werewolf attempting unsuccessfully to return to normal. This probably has nothing to do with the "'Bama Rushmore" story, however.

Mary Jo

HISTORY LESSON: UNTIL HE KILLED MARY JO, TEDDY WAS THE NEXT KENNEDY IN LINE TO BE PRESIDENT.

Old Perv Teddy Kennedy's Head Finally Explodes

Senator Edward M. Kennedy, D-Ma, was rushed to the hospital today after suffering a seizure on the Senate floor. The seizure appeared to be brought on by by Kennedy's sexual fantasies while staring at a young Senate intern. Here is the story in sequential photographs.

First we see Senator Kennedy staring with sexual fervor at the ass of the young lady as she was bending over to pick up some papers off the floor. Note the intense lustful interest in his gaze.

Next we see, immediately following, the snapping of his brain passages as he begins to experience the seizure.

Here is a picture os Thema Simpkins who claimed that the senator bit her finger as she tried to keep him from swallowing his tongue.

Finally, below is an artist's conception of the way the senator looked during the episode.

Here's The Cocksucker!

JOSEF FRITZL —Amsttetten, Austria

HERE IS THE COCKSUCKER WHO IMPRISONED HIS DAUGHTER FOR 24 YEARS AND HAD 7 CHILDREN WITH HER!!!!

PLEASE LET THE OFFICIALS IN AUSTRIA KNOW WHAT YOU THINK SHOULD BE DONE WITH HIM! AND DON'T GIVE ME THAT "INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY" BULLSHIT! THIS FUCKER NEEDS TO BE EXECUTED!!!